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It was his choice to not be with me. He had told me himself that he wanted to play the field and to be able to do what ever he wanted when he wanted. He said I alone love you,I alone need you,I alone know all your secrets and your deepest desires and your fears. I was the one you ran too cried too and what did I get for it nothing you ran to the first guy and fucked him and then took him back even when you knew that he would hurt you but you knew you had me to fall back on, me that you could run too and cry too and be completely loved by but that never crossed your mind. And for the first time I looked upon my soft hearted man that I had shared so much with, I even called him after I masterbated and we even talked about that. It never really did occur to me that he might have other feelings for me then that. I knew I loved him and that he would always be my special friend but it really never crossed my mind that I was hurting him or anything even remotely close for that matter.. ." her voice dropped to a terrified whisper, "to invoke Protocol 14!" She stopped speaking again, hiding in my chest. I stroked her hair and kissed her again, trying to show her I loved her.I didn't know what Protocol 14 was. I didn't understand any of this. But she obviously knew, and it apparently was terrible. I felt her body trembling as she worked up the courage to go on."Protocol 14 was designed by our... ancestors, just for this reason. Very few knew about it. I may have been the only one left to know of it, besides the leader, and he had forgotten about it. They knew we would reach this stage someday and would need it. But the forces that made it work demanded a high price. The number of people to die had to remain constant. I could only save you two if two lives were forfeited as the cycles ended. There was no exception. I didn't know who those people would be. I didn't, Patrick! I promise I didn't! I might not have done it if I had known it would be Elizabeth. I just would.
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